Just a reminder to people in privileged positions
Exceptionalism is not complimentary.
“But you’re not like the rest of them, you’re cool!”
“I can’t believe you know so much about (x thing), I’ve never seen a (member of y marginalized group) talk about this with such authority!”
- it pits us against other people in our group (fuck that)
- it reifies inequitable social structures by reinforcing privilege (allowing one person a ‘pass’ into the privileged group is not breaking down barriers)
- it’s condescending and grossAnd it’s HURTFUL. IT HURTS. Once you realize, with a little more life lived, that what these folk are actually telling you is “the rest of y’all ain’t shit, but you’ll do, pig; otherwise, I wouldn’t be putting up with you either…but the minute you do something to remind me of your ‘otherness’ you become ‘unexceptional’” - and when it happens, the betrayal felt…ugh.
THIS!
!!!!!
ALL OF IT. A specific case of this that always stuns me is when people don’t understand why saying things like “You’re so well spoken!” to a black person isn’t a compliment. Bill O’Reilly actually complained on his show to a couple of black guests that he should get to say that and it shouldn’t be taken badly. The reason it fucking sucks to hear that is because it’s essentially saying, “Oh wow - without knowing you or having spoken to you at all, I decided on sight that you were going to be a fucking fool, but you proved me wrong! Good for you!” That’s what it feels like. It’s like, why did you assume I wouldn’t be? Why would you even comment on it if it wasn’t a surprise to you?
Oh well I normally hate dogs because they shit on my carpet but you appear to be housebroken, good puppy!
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Oh well I normally hate dogs because they shit on my carpet but you appear to be housebroken, good puppy!
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ALL OF IT. A specific case of this that always stuns me is when people don’t understand why saying things like “You’re...
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